The Memo

No one should take the FBI memo that Trump and the other idiots want to release with even the largest salt grain. Because they are no longer trustworthy. Ever. It’s mind-boggling the lack of consequences for lying directly to our faces so many, many times. Irregardless of the contents, this memo should not be taken seriously.

This memo is brought to you by such luminaries as soon-to-be-retired Trey Gowdy. He’s best known for using the FBI as a cudgel to Benghazi the fuck out of us, confusing the shit out of the easily confused and wasting millions upon millions of taxpayer dollars only to prove Hillary’s innocence. Great. Devin Nunes, most famous for becoming Trump’s lapdog almost immediately after he was sworn in. His mad dash to lick Trump’s boots has been praised by the far more reputable BDSM industry as “legendary”. The House of Republicans voted to release the memo. We know already how honest and not-at-all bloodthirsty those fuck faces are. Paul Ryan should be lit on fire then have the fire put out, then be lit on fire again after his melted penis is put in his own mouth. I fucking hate Paul Ryan.

All of these men (white, straight men, hmmm) have demonstrated a willingness to lie that is only surpassed by pathological malignant narcissist psychopaths. And the most pathological malignant narcissist psychopath, the one all others call “what a fucking pile of shit garbage who is so unevolved and monstrous, nay, amorphous, his name should be stricken from the list of homo sapiens and placed firmly back in the primordial ooze and then we should restart the entire existence of life on Earth just so another thing like him never arises”, that idiot thinks it’s a good idea. Has he told a single truth since taking office? Since running for office? Ever?

If we’re going to pretend reality has any business near the world we currently inhabit, fact-checking isn’t enough. Fact-checking is reactive. Fact-checking is always behind the echo chamber. Fact-checking is shouting into to the void.

But if we use fact-checking correctly, which is to say, if we fucking learn a goddam lesson from it, then we can divine a pattern of behavior that can be used to predict probable future behavior. Like, for instance, if someone lies to you a lot, you stop trusting them and eventually, if they lie to you enough, you stop listening to them. I don’t give a fuck what these liars say, they are lying until proven otherwise, and they never bother to do the proving because their lies spread farther, faster if they don’t.

So here’s my crazy thought about stopping the rash of fake news; stop putting the people who spread it on TV. Stop listening to them when they say they have some information, because it won’t be what they say it is, mean what they say it means, but, crucially, it will do what they want it to. It will obfuscate the truth - which is the point - it will convince those who want to believe their side is right no matter the reality - which is the point - it will erode any sense of confidence in the media - which it has already done, not that they needed the help.

Continuing to pay attention to these liars only inspires them to lie more. Stop listening, stop watching, stop clicking, stop reading, otherwise we’re just perpetuating the cycle. Start with yourself, and eventually we can convince the media to follow along.


Probably not, though.